Happy National Curl Crush Day! (Yes, it's a real thing)
This marks a two year anniversary since I decided to embrace my natural hair. When I made that decision... ya'll... I was scared! Terrified, because my hair was in a sad, sad state. Luckily, I had some help and guidance and learned how to tend to my hair. It was definitely a journey. Most of all, it was an opportunity to explore that age old question: "Who am I?"
Embracing yourself in your fullness is not an easy task. When you've looked in the mirror and identified yourself as one way for so many years and then come face to face with a different one looking back, it's a force for awakening. For weeks and even months, I would struggle with embracing myself.
"My face looks fat."
"My forehead is huge"
"My hair is disproportionate to my body." (I know, I know! Totally ridiculous!)
"I'm not attractive anymore. People are always attracted to long hair."
"What have I done?"
"Why am I doing this?"
"I'll never be enough."
Ouch. That last sentence, am I right? Taking of the wigs and letting go of the weaves was the unveiling of the "not enough story" I was carrying around. Everyday I would summon up the courage to face the world with my bald edges and tiny curls (I'm talking real short) and learn how to embrace myself and discover my worth that was deeper than my self manufactured image.
I had to learn how to embrace my body, curves and all. I had to embrace my face, my skin, and my roots. I had to challenge myself to get comfortable with MYSELF. I would watch my hair grow out, pray for my edges to return (BBW know what I'm speaking about! ) and marvel at the perfectly coiffed, tight little coils that were my natural hair pattern. I'm a curly girl now and I love it!
What I've discovered in the process of allowing myself the freedom to BE is that:
1) As I remove the judgement from self, I discover my true essence and beauty.
2) As I see myself with eyes of love, I witness the hearts of others and feel such deep love and compassion for the world around me. This love thing is real ya'll! 🏿
3) As I uncover the fears that craft my "not enough story", life has a way of putting to test the truth to see if I really get it. Everyday, I stand more powerfully in my truth that yes, I am so very enough - enough for my dreams, enough for my desire, enough for love, and enough for the love I have to give and receive.
4) As I take the pressure off from fitting into a mold of perfection and allow myself to be, the people around me feel safer to be themselves to. Authenticity is contagious because it's embedded with joy!
Next time you're standing in the mirror, judging yourself, ask yourself this question: "How would love see me?" Listen to that voice. That voice will transform your life. That voice will uplift the people you love. That voice will change the world.
